Most of the nightmare is now over. Dad and family are having their lovely re-union in Singapore, I spoke to him before he left to ensure that he left on a positive note. I am coming to terms with the fact that I am someone that it is nice for him to see every now and then, effectively someone from the past. This is not the relationship I want but it is what he has chosen so I haven't really got a lot of choice. I have spoken to my grandmother who is still crying about him leaving, I will go and visit her in a week or two, its a 10 hour round trip in teh car which is a bit of a killer. I feel empty at the the moment, it is not the easiest time.
I now have my twin sister staying until tomorrow afternoon when she flies to the US. Mum and step Dad came around for a curry last night and I sat in the lounge listening to them eating and laughing, smelling the curry. I couldn't sit at the table and eat nothing. Wife is making a fish pie for them to eat tonight......
On the eating front the will to eat something is incredible. I am ignoring all the cries from my body to eat something as in the long run it is not going to achieve anything apart from slow weightloss however this diet is now officially killing me. I finish it in 3.5 weeks and move to 10 weeks management regardless of what my weight is.
Last weeks weigh in was anyother good one at 8lb. Therefore I have gone from 18s 1lb to 15s 9lb. I am the heaviest guy at the group but far from the fattest. I barely overhang my belt and Everyone is now telling me not to lose any more weight but I would like to do another stone and a half if I can and get below 14s.
I don't want to think about the last three days, today mum goes to sicily for a week, and sis goes tomorrow, then it is back to normal. Thank god. I am having a recurring dream about eating a massive battenburg cake, I hate this stuff so it is more of a nightmare....
